Last week I started reading Lance Armstrong's first biography (birth to first TDF victory) It's Not About the Bike. A few chapters in, one big point that Lance made sure the reader understood, he races (and lives) with a killer instinct that can't be taught. Sure, he has all the physical tools, but so did every other elite cyclists he raced against. Talent has never been a direct translation to championships (just ask Macca about his history at Kona). At the toughest part of the race, Lance could work himself into such a fit of rage and power away from opponents on anger. "Rip their legs off" was the way he described his goal when he attacked. He rode with a chip on his shoulder and attacked like a brazened assassin with knife drawn.
The reason I mention this is because I know that attitude can’t be taught, but can it be learned, acquired on one’s own will? Because I think the most powerful weapon in any activity that requires being pushed to the limit is to wield absolute control over your ability. Some coaches simplify this to knowing your limits, but I think that ignores the great ones’ capacity to achieve a near second consciousness, recognizing those days when they have no limits and capitalizing these brushes with invincibility by pouring out every once of their fleeting divinity to punish their hapless, mortal rivals. Lance’s fuel came from every direction, anyone telling he and his mother they would never amount to anything, the poor kid with no Dad who sucked at football. Then it came from his pro competitors and the press. He was too brash, bullheaded and irreverent, basically too American to be a champion in this thoroughly European sport. And there was no way anyone could beat cancer and the world’s 200 best bike racers in the same lifetime.
In an applied sense, my question is this: has my lack of adversity set me up for mediocrity, never allowing me (read as forcing me) to access all my potential? My early life was the polar opposite of Armstrong’s. I grew up in a Cleaver-like seal of support. In high school I sort of tried the whole anger channeling thing with mixed results. It made me work harder, but not necessarily get better. And if things turned sour despite my best efforts, that anger quickly became self-destructive. It also becomes increasingly hard to control the on/off switch: the more you compete angry, the more you live angry, and that’s not my goal. I don’t want to hate the world, just ride like it. Also, I’m not 100% convinced that’s the only way to do it. There has to be some way to excel and still be a nice guy. There has to be.
